(DC Pundit) – The battle for the souls of Ohio’s elementary school kids is heating up faster than a preacher’s sermon. The Satanic Temple has decided to crash the party at Edgewood Elementary in Marysville, Ohio, with their own brand of after-school fun.
They’re calling it the Hellions Academy of Independent Learning, or HAIL for short. Talk about a marketing team that’s earning their pitchforks! This little shindig is set to kick off this month, and it’s got more than a few folks clutching their pearls.
June Everett, the Satanic Temple’s spokesperson, says they’re not actually worshipping Old Scratch. In fact, they’re about as spiritual as a rock. “We are not devil worshipers,” Everett said. “We are non-theistic, meaning we don’t believe in any supernatural deities, and that includes, you know, God or Satan.”
So why are they stirring the pot? Well, it seems they’ve got a bee in their bonnet over LifeWise Academy, a Christian program that’s been letting kids skip class for some good old-fashioned Bible study. Everett didn’t beat around the bush: “We really are no fan of it. We do believe strongly in religious pluralism and religious freedom. But we would absolutely go away if they stopped doing their program.”
The Satanic Temple is offering a Satan Club for students at a @MarysvilleEVSD elementary school in Ohio. Despite obvious satanic symbols, an organizer for the Satanic Temple claims “it’s not teaching Satanism.”
They are trying to indoctrinate and corrupt your children. pic.twitter.com/eOeEMVuY0J
— Libs of TikTok (@libsoftiktok) December 4, 2024
So far, HAIL has managed to rope in four brave souls, while LifeWise currently has 251 students across the district. But Everett’s not sweating the numbers. “As long as there’s one child wanting to attend and one family wanting to send their child, that’s all that we care about,” she remarked.
Meanwhile, over at LifeWise, CEO Joel Penton is playing it cooler than the other side of the pillow. He’s all for letting parents choose, saying, “We believe all families should have the opportunity to choose religious study during school hours, and we trust parents to make the best choice for their children.”
As for the Marysville School District? They’re keeping mum on the whole situation. Probably figuring out how to thread this needle without pricking their fingers.
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